When Your Morning Is Just Right...

...and you found time to blog. yeah \m/

More often than not, thoughts flow more easily when I hear something. I can't work when it's too quiet. My mind gets too cluttered by my other thoughts. So, usually, when I write - I listen to music and stuff. I can work in a crowded place, I can write productively when people around me are noisy - I do fine. The only time I prefer not to listen to music is when I'm writing or composing a song. But since I'm blogging, you get my point. :) And right now, A Thousand Years by Christina Peri is on repeat.

It's when songs, are able to speak your heart out. It's when you - don't need to talk. You just let the music play and let the person you're dedicating it to - hear the song and take it in and all.

I don't know why I love writing. But I'm very glad that I do. I promise that next year, blogging will be in my daily list. It'll be in my must dos for the day.

My boyfriend is still asleep. Well, back asleep that is. ;)

I've always ... always blogged about love. And yes, this is another love blog.

I have very much enjoyed our Christmas break even though there are times that my thoughts get bombarded with schoolwork that I have to do immediately. I've enjoyed being able to spend time with my mom and dad and my sister and her daughter. And of course, I've enjoyed my visits.

On the 24th, my visit was unexpected. He suddenly showed up. And it was already around 5 or 6pm. And I still haven't showered yet. LOL. I couldn't be happier. Not that he brought me a gift, but that he showed up. I got to hug him as tight as hell.

We agreed to have no gifts for each other this Christmas. We were both damn broke. It was okay because money has always been spent for food. Grabe. We always ate food and food and food. Ubos lagi pera sa food.

So bale .. ayun.

Day before that, we watched Immortals (FINALLY:D) and had lunch together then headed home.

The present meant a lot by the way. The thought of putting ME first before HIMSELF, was such a big deal. I mean, he had cash because that was his parents' gift to him. He was planning to buy pants. We even looked around and already decided which to buy and all but ended up not buying anything.

I didn't have much. And was really planning to get him a present by next year. But if I saved up the money I had from my godmother, and got him something - anything - maybe that meant a lot too. I felt so guilty that day when he came by. I knew he probably bought my present first before his. It was so heartwarming and shit. I didn't know what to say that time. I just hugged him and I couldn't stop smiling and - basta ang saya. ;)

He told me afterwards that ... alangan naman daw na walang gift yung baby niya. :')

He got me earphones by the way :) The one I've been eyeing on. SUSHI EARPHONES <3 :)

But um uhh ... that was all I was trying to say. I just think that love really means ... being selfless. Putting the one you love first ... making her happy because you know that when she's happy, you end up being happy as well.

Yesterday, we were together again. And I just love every minute of it. Whether we may be busy watching something, or talking, or laughing or arguing or whatever - every minute and every second of that I swear that everything with him is irreplaceable. I wouldn't trade anything in the world for it. ;)

I'm thinking of waking him up anytime soon but before that. I thought of blogging about Jason Magbanua but we'll see. We'll see :)

Ciaaooooo;):*

"No fight can ever make me let go of you."

Someone once told me this: "No fight can ever make me let go of you."


And up to this day, it's something I always keep in mind.

No fight did ever make him let go if me. We just grew apart. And now, I'm in a new relationship. And just like any relationship, we have our ups and downs. And by the downside of every relationship, we have our fights.

I don't need to detail in any fight for any of you to understand. I think it's clear that we too have shortcomings and have misunderstandings.

I was never good with handling such. I back myself up by being strong. I've always been good at letting the public know that I'm okay. I can fake it with anyone - if I want to. But I never faked it with my boyfriend. I never faked being okay. As much as possible, I've always made sure to be as transparent as I could be with the people that matter a lot to me. So, if I'm not okay with anything, I let him know as soon as possible and don't hold any grudges against him. We talk things out, and sometimes the talking turns to fighting. But it's okay to fight as long as at the end of the day, you know who you still wanna be with ... and you know how important every second with him should be like - meaning ... you know you wanna fix things ... and you WILL fix things before the day ends. Or, if you wanna sleep things over, don't sleep without letting him know that you love him ... and will still do in the morning. That ... you're just sleeping to cool your head off and in the morning, still talk things through. You should make it clear that you were mad at what he did or what he said or what he didn't do or didn't say and not at him. Do you get me? Be mad at what the person did - not at the person. But then maybe that's already clear.

After all these said, I just wanna let him know that ... no fight could ever make me let go of him.

No fight could ever make me let go of you, Babe. We may have our ups and downs ... but I seriously swear ... I seriously pinkyswear ... that I doubt I'd even grow tired of you or of us. No matter what happens ... you're still the one ... you're still the only one I could ever picture my future with. Okay? :') I love you. And, I'm sorry.

Remember, no pride is ever worth keeping if it means losing the person you love the most. You don't have to be the person who has wronged the other - to be the first to let your guard down.

I Don't Know How He Does It

Since facebook is totally being a huge pain in the ass right now, I have indeed decided to post it here first. ;)

I seriously don't know how he does it;)

I don't know how he manages to sweep me off my feet everyday. I don't know how he manages to make me turn red - everyday. I don't know how he's able to make me feel loved, and special - everyday.

I do not know how he does it. ;)

I don't know how he manages to wake up and get dressed an hour earlier, just to travel to the south to be able to surprise me and have breakfast with me - rain or shine on a damn school day:')

^this happened today. He told me last night that I was gonna be super happy today and that I might cry - turns out I really did. I was so happy. But you see, for our first semester this third year, we used to have breakfast every Tuesday and Thursday due to our schedule. But now, since our schedules won't likely meet, TTH Breakfasts are over. </3 But but but, yes - I guess it's not! :') He told me he's gonna try to make it again on Thursday:') (previous sem, we'd meet up in Makati. And by the time I gotta go head off to my first class, he'd have enough travel time to go to his school in Parañaque.) To cut the pretty long story short, he arrived south a little bit late coz his estimation of the time wasn't that right coz he forgot to consider the weather ... but it doesn't matter coz we or I, really had an awesome morning;) We had breakfast in the bus:) Sisig from 7eleven - practically one of our favorites. It's as cheap as 29 pesos, it tastes good and you'd get full :) Okay - then ... that's just about it for this story;) We both got off at Coastal then I rode my bus to Makati, then he rode his jeep to school ;) Again, I was happy. The type of happy you can't explain :")

I don't know how he's able to still give me butterflies. I never felt that we were this typical couple who were obliged to go out and stuff and had this schedule for each other and - I don't know. We'd often talk about stuff like these. Like, what we think of other people and all. And i must say that ... being different individually - still made us different as being one.

I don't know what other guys do for their girls. But I'm proud to say that my guy is way too awesome to even be compared to others.

His sweetness, is so genuine that I'd really feel that he loves me. The way he looks at me, I do feel like I'm the apple of his eye. The way he hugs me tight - it's not the type of hug you can no longer breathe coz it's tight or anything ... but rather ... it's the type of hug you don't ever want to get out of.

I don't know how he's able to make me feel secure and safe enough that I really do love being around him.

I don't know how he's able to continue to make me feel like I have known him my whole life and still makes me want to spend the rest of it - with him. Because for those who do not know, this guy right here ... I still haven't known him for a year now, and we have just been together for nearly seven months ... yet, I've always felt like ... it's much much longer than that. It's like, there are even times wherein he knows me better than I know myself. And though a lotta people find it scary that that point comes wherein the two of you are gonna finish each other's sentences - it doesn't creep me out at all coz apparently, there have been times that we do.

And for all these said and all those left unsaid ... I know for sure why this love is so damn worth fighting for. 

I guess I just felt like bragging again;) HEE. At least it's shorter than the previous entries, huh?:)

Anyways. That's for this day:) Hope to be able to blog much more often:):D

11.11.11

It was an adventure. I know I'm always gonna remember this day. Though I know that a lotta days are very much worth remembering and though this wasn't that different from the others that we've had, it was really an adventure and ... I had some realizations. :)

So, my day was the usual. I got up late since my class starts at 1040. I got up around 8 or so. Left past 9. Arrived school just in time. :)

Had my first day of suck ass physics class. Got dismissed at 12. Then headed to my org meeting. We were told that the meeting was gonna be until 2. But then it ended much earlier like around 1 or way before 1. 10mins before 1? But that doesn't matter.

Waited for the hubby to arrive from school at the footsteps of SM Makati. The one near F21 and Kettle Corn that I badly wanted to buy from that time. When he arrived, we headed to Landmark foodcourt and had lunch near Jollibee. We had 39ers. Yay one of my favorites <3

Lunch was yummy. (as usual)

We were supposed to meet up with my mom coz she was supposed to meet up with me around 2. But then, homie has to go home to change his clothes and leave some stuff. At first, he was already saying goodbye. He stood next to me at the foodcourt. I actually don't really know how to describe that situation. But I do remember blushing because I found him very much attractive and hot that time. HOHO.

He then kissed me goodbye on my forehead then he bent down to let me kiss him on the cheek. I stayed to wait for my mom. Then, in less than a minute or so, I called or he called then he told me he was gonna go back so that he could leave his iPod with me so that I could have something to do while waiting for my mom.

I played Unblock Me (currently my favorite app!! lol) till my mom arrived around 230 or laterrrr D: -_-

Then, we headed to the third floor and shop for some trimmings for the Christmas tree. Our theme for this year is purple and green, YAY:) The flowers and the balls looked really pretty :) After some time, nearing 5pm I think, finally, the slow homie arrived aka my hubby aka Babe LOLOLOL :) HEEHEE.

Before leaving, I asked my mom for some more datung / cash - hooray coz she handed me more than I expected.

I changed my clothes inside a dressing room. At first my shirt was too small for me, homie had an extra shirt with him that he let me wear. Boo. Hehe. But it looked good since it fit me just right:)

After thaaaat - we headed to the MRT station which was unfortunately already super filled with people. Daaaaang~ all the pawis and icky men ew. HAHA. But oh well. So, at first when we were on line 6, nearing the window already, we realized that that was the wrong window. So yes, we had to go line up again on some other number. The line was long, I tell you. Super long. But lines that long don't seem that long when you're with someone. HEE:)

When we finally got on the train (which was a pretty huge struggle for the both of us), the trip wasn't comftable at all. But I got to sit when we were already 2 stations nearing Ortigas.

We did a LOT of walking. We walked from SM Megamall, so EDSA Shang - to actually ... holy boogie I can't remember the name of the condominium. Anyways, next time I'll post it though. So, from there, we rode a jeepney. SABIT YAY:D I love my boyfriend so much because he lets me do crazy stuff I want:) I know, I know it's dangerous and all. But it's fun! Though I'm not encouraging you to try it out - DO TRY IT :) HAHAHA. But maybe try muna sa province :) Hehe.

It was really fun coz I got to experience it here in Manila. And, with my boyfriend :) We dint know where to get off exactly.

Oh. If you're wondering where it was we were heading - BANCHETTO MEGATENT, YO. For the sky lantern thingy.

Going back to what I was saying, when some other man made "sabit", homie sorta got to talk to him and asked where we should get off if going to Meralco Ave.

BTW, we just Google Map stuff. So. Most of our adventures, really are adventures. :)

So, the man told us that we've already missed the stop and we should already get off and cross and stuff. So, we got off, crossed the street then that's where most of our time was spent. Super long time waiting for a jeepney that's gonna take us there and that was willing to let us go "sabit". There was this one jeepney driver who said it wasn't permitted, but then he asked if it was just my boyfriend coz if it was, he could. So I was like WHAT THE HELL, MANONG. Rockstar to. I can "sabit". Oh well. That driver really pissed me off. I wish we still got on that jeepney since he wouldn't see me naman if ever I still made "sabit" e.

Then, since it was such a struggle to get a jeepney or a taxi (if you could just see how sweaty we were and all), we asked this officer to help us get a ride. Then he told us that we too could ride the FX going to Banchetto. There was also this time that we felt like we were being followed so that's the time we stood near the officer. But the man who was following us still went near us. He looked really creepy. He wore a light blue shirt and some shorts and held nothing of whatsoever. He just followed us and kept on looking. Creepy little f*.

We finally got a ride. Then when  we got off at the Renaissance Towers, tada :) Banchetto Megatent was just beside it.

There weren't that much people but there were already a lotta cars. I guess you guys already know. YES, we ended up sweating and getting our legs get so damn worked up for NOTHING (for the Banchetto part tho. But all in all, I had fun).

I swear that it sorta broke my heart that it dint push through due to shitty reasons they had and excuses and all, but most of all, I felt - I don't know how to describe it in anymore proper way that Banchetto - that's bullshit. *sorry babe love you :)*

I mean, they could've thought about that even just a DAY earlier. Not around 11am. How on earth do they expect for EVERYONE to know. It's not my fault I dint roder any lanterns that's why I dint receive a message. But damn they should've had an alternative or whatever for what they did.

But I guess I no longer need to rant that much and I guess you guys understand how pissed off I got so that's about it about Banchetto.

So, we just enjoyed the full moon :) And dint stay long since it was a really far away land for us to either commute or wait for my folks to pick me up. So, we decided to just go to Mercato instead. We rode the jeep till Crossing then the MRT to Ayala. When we finally got there, grabe, home sweet home yung dating. 

We changed our shirts (huhu no longer matching shirts :( ) then freshened up then headed to G4. We had a Whopper Jr from BK, popcorn (white cheddar!) and lemonade. While eating at Taters, we put out our chips and cards and played some poker. When we got tired playing at the mall and figured it aint the same compared to being comfy and cozy when at home while playing cards, we ended up talking. <3 :)

When folks were already done with their reunion they had to attend to, they already called me up. On our way down, we hugged and had a super quick kiss like yes a smack for a kiss goodbye. Then just held hands as we went out.

Had his pictures taken by the huge Christmas tree though.

We no longer headed to Mercato or even just High Street because it had already rained and all so, we wouldn't enjoy the place as much and we were both tired from our pretty long travel, we both decided to stay in Makati instead.

And for what I have realized ... though we both still haven't figured out why such happened to us, I'm pretty sure that even without lanterns or whatsoever, I needed not to wish for more. I already had my wish granted when I had him ... and not only that, I also had my prayers answered. ;)

I don't think I have ever been THIS happy in my entire life;) <3

I think I'll just post pictures sometime this week maybe. Hoho. Let's see;)

Hope you all had a beyond wonderful and awesome 11.11.11 :) Because no matter how tiring mine was, I know and am sure that mine was as usual, incredible because I spent it with him;):)

*I love you to infinity and beyond, Babe:)*

Yes, another love blog

The only time I get to blog, is when my boyfriend is busy. LOL.

Sembreak has been awesome for me. And damn why wouldn't it be when you've got a boyfriend like mine? ;)

Even before sembreak, I have been with a guy .. who treats me .. like I'm his fragile little princess, who he guards so much and does everything in his will to make me feel loved. Here I am, blogging and honestly, I'd like to brag about him.

During school days, on days that my class begins earlier than his, we'd meet up much earlier just so we could have breakfast together. Sometimes, I'd be late. Giving us less than 30 or 20 mins of seeing each other. And that would already be enough to make my day. Then, if his class ends earlier than mine, it's either he'd pick me up from school, then head home to my place OR he'd wait till I get out then we'd meet up at Coastal just so we'd ride home together.

Just so you guys know, this guy lives in Makati. While I, I live in Las Piñas. He studies in Parañaque, I study in Makati. Sort of a long distance relationship but not so since we often see each other.

He has always made sure that we meet - everyday. No matter how long it's gonna take or how short like just a minute or two, it matters that we see each other in person before that day ends. If we fail to see each other, we go and meet through Skype. And by those days, those would be Sundays and days classes are suspended.

I don't know how else to describe to you how patient of a boyfriend it is I have got. But I do know there were times I don't think I'll ever forget.

• it was our monthsary. But it wasn't that sure that we'd both meet. So, I decided to tag along with my friends going to Divisoria. I thought we'd be back right away. He ended up waiting for me at Food Choices in Glorietta 4 for almost 4 hours. And what's worse, I couldn't stay for even ten or five minutes because my dad was already there, waiting for me too and we'd already have to head home. That day was so frustrating. 4 hours of waiting in trade of what - less than a minute or so of getting to see me. We just hugged. I even cried telling him how sorry I was. He cried too. I felt so bad. But we dint fight. We just both felt so sad and upset how the day turned out. BUT HECK - go find a guy who's gonna wait for you for hours then get nothing but a hug not lasting ten seconds - I tell you  they are so damn few. So hell yeah I'm as lucky as I could get.
• i had a shoot in Antipolo. We ended at around 5 or 6. We got back in Makati around 7 or 8. He waited for me to arrive. Then, we commuted on our way home (to my place). I mean .. just so I'd get home safely, he takes me home no matter what time of day it was. And again, I'm beyond thankful. :*
• there was also this time that I uhh .. ended late in school. (or did I have some sort of field trip? I can't remember but again, it was already late) He rode the shuttle with me going home. It was already too late for us to commute. Heck, it was already too late for him to even take me home then head back home to Makati. I just .. can't believe what a guy it is I have.
• there was this one time, we were just starting out as a couple. I was watching No Strings Attached that morning. (this was during summer and I think some of you guys already know this) And then, for some reason, I felt bad and wondered why - I was the type of girl who's always always loved romantic stuff. Sweet stuff. Surprises. And aaaaall those stuff hopeless romantics love. Then I wondered, how come my boyfriend was nothing like that. I can't remember the exact words I told him that afternoon. All I remember was that I was so upset. I probably told him stuff that hurt a lot. Then, I even told him that he takes care and shit - I sounded a lot like I was saying good bye for the meantime. I even told him that I badly wanted a hug that time because I really felt so down. After that phone call, I took a bath then just hung out with my cousin. We talked about stuff and ate merienda. He was the first person who knew that my boyfriend and I were already together. Around 6pm, my boyfriend texted me. Tells me to look at the clouds. He said they looked nice. But then, I was too lazy to get up and go outside to check and see. So, I told him that he should just take a picture of it then show it to me when we'd meet. He prolly got pissed off and told me to go out coz he's there. My heart started to beat so fast and I hardly could breathe. Much more when I opened the door then he came closer. I still haven't opened the gate then. I was seriously catching my breath. Then he said "Sabi mo gusto mo ng hug." then my tears started to fall and shit - I swear that that moment was epic. HOHO. I opened up the gate then hugged him tight. Then we already sat down to talk about stuff and by that time, I was still catching my breath. Then there was this one more thing he said "Boyfriend na ba ko ngayon?" > a real good way of making bawi huh. LOL. But yeah ; )

Those are just a few of why I'm beyond thankful to have him. ; ) There has been numerous times that we've cried while talking or while hugging. It's just like .. we feel so grateful to have each other.

I think it's different when the both of you are smiling, with tears falling;) I think it's different when you find someone, who's gonna love you whether you've showered or you haven't yet. Whether you could burp real hard like a man or not. I think it's different when you find someone you could totally be yourself with. It's when laying next to each other is quite enough to last a lifetime of smiles. It's when .. you find someone you're gonna feel free to share your hopes and dreams with. It's when you blog about him then you find yourself smiling and again, you're gonna start to tear up anytime soon. It's when you find someone who's gonna slowdance with you, wherever whenever. It's when cuddling next to each other is enough on a rainy day. It's when, his voice in the morning is enough to startle up your day and get you going. It's different when, you can't seem to last being in a fight with him when you're together and not know how to end it even though you already badly want to when on the phone. It's when you're willing to fry shit for him even if you hate frying. It's when he travels from north to south just to be with you. It's when he commutes even though it's so damn hot and he's the type who perspires a lot. It's different when you get to find someone who's very much willing to look silly with you in public. It's when the two of you could walk in a silly way and not care what other people think. It's when you hold his hand and think - there's no other hand you'd rather be holding than his. It's when you look in his eyes and feel - like reaaaally feel that YOU ARE HIS WORLD. No. You're practically gonna feel like his sun, since that's where his world revolves around. It's when you feel like a princess even though he doesn't call you one. It's when you close your eyes, think of him, and cannot help but smile. It's when .. a day is not enough to let others know how strongly you feel about a certain someone. It's when you can't breathe - and for once it's sort of okay. It's when .. you just know it - that THIS is it. And if ever it aint - you're still hoping that it is.

I guess this is already long; ) I still hope that I could really blog more often. Again, I'll try. :):)) 

Random Thoughts

I have always been amazed with how strong the power of love could always be. Or maybe not just by love. Because of all emotions or whatsoever - love IS the most powerful. But I think that all emotions in general could take over so much of what happens in a person's life.

• You not being okay with someone, could be able to make you feel so down for like - as long as you guys get back to being in good terms.
• You missing a friend could make you think about the memories you both had back then the whole period of your major subject which could probably mean three straight hours then still continue to think about him/her during breaktime.
• You just seeing your crush - the mere fact of just SEEING someone you like - could get you through the day. It is not necessary that he/she says hi. The more that it aint necessary that he/she talks to you or approaches you or whatsoever. Which means - could you just imagine if just seeing could get you through a day ... what more if they approached you? I think that would probably get you through the entire week.
• You getting a letter from your mom/dad or both just telling you of how they appreciate you and all the stuff that you do - could make you tear up and have that smile on your face you know is just priceless.
• You get a hug - that huge tight hug you've been longing for from a certain person - could actually make ALL the physical pain that you've got go away. And sometimes, the emotional pain even. The type of hug you know that once you receive it - you'll be fine.
• You get a kiss - the type of kiss that don't need to be wild or long or whatever - the simplest kiss you could ever imagine - it don't need to be on the lips - it could be on the forehead, on your cheek - the kiss that tells it all. It could tell you "I missed you so much" or "I'm so glad to see you" or "I like you ... a lot" or "Thank you" or "You make me happy or "You're more than enough" - stuff like those.
• You get a look - the look that says you're in trouble, you did something so wrong that you hurt me I wont talk to you type of thing - those types that your mom could give you and just be cold? Others would see it as something good coz it's a getaway card to do anything you want since she wont mind you - but I (being close with my mom) see it as something so painful that I'm really sorry about what I did and shit.
• You get another look - the type of look that no matter how much make-up you put on - this LOOK at you - could make you feel like you're the fairest of them all. You don't just feel beautiful - you feel lovely. And when a person feels such about how he/she looks like - that would be more than enough to boost up their self-confidence.
• You're mad at someone - you try to control your temper so bad you end up looking for other outlets. (these are probably for those who can't express their anger directly at the people they're angry at) You drink, you smoke, you do drugs, you hurt yourself - damn .. don't you guys think it's stupid to create self-inflicted shit? I dunno. As far as I know - nothing beats praying and ranting out at a good friend who's there to listen and true enough or maybe wise enough to give some advice or something. I don't know. I still believe that nothing beats emotional pain. And that whatever you do to yourself physically or whatever pain you receive physically - will never be anything compared to that of emotional pain. Or maybe it's just my opinion. (well, everything's my opinion lol)
• You don't get greeted by a friend on your birthday - you feel so mad your day is ruined (depends on who that friend is and what level of importance that friend is to you. hahaha)
• You get sweet, endearing messages from the person you love - and holypopcorn that smile on your face? I bet would be a huge challenge to be wiped off.

I think that life is amazing. You live it EVERYDAY. And you OUGHT to make the best out of it. You gotta learn from it. There are times that you gotta take stuff step by step - but there are also these things you have got to keep up with. It's true that life is short. Life is so short. That at your age right now, whatever that might be - you reach my age which is 19? I feel like I've missed out on so much, or .. life has been so fast for me I barely remember stuff from gradeschool or it's like I'm always in a rush. And when I'm taking my time - I'd always be slacking off - sleeping! I somewhat think that when I sleep - I wasted hours of something I could've done and made life much worth meaningful than it already is.

I no longer know what it is I'm talking about. But all I wanna say is (going back to where I started) ... I enjoy life as much as I enjoy my curiosity about so much of what the world has to offer. And I talked about emotion and feelings this time .. coz I dunno. It was a random thought this evening and again, I did miss blogging. So .. I think that since emotions are so important because they deal with feelings ... I'd want everyone to know that they shouldn't take anything for granted. Your life, your feelings, your time, your talent, your priceless possessions - your loved ones. Actually, even those you don't love - you shouldn't take em for granted. As a matter of fact - never take anything for granted. Nothing lasts forever except eternity with God that is - but talking about the context of our world - our universe - everything comes to an end. So while you're living this life that is given to you, this life that you still have this moment as you read this - cherish everything. Change things that can be changed as long as their for the better. Love people as long as their here and are physically present. Be careful and as much as possible - consider that EVERYONE has feelings, that they can be fragile, that some of them can't forget the pain you can cause, that they could expect, that they could get hurt, that they could be inspired, that they could be better people through you and if you make mistakes with dealing with how people feel - they're not stuff you can take back.

I don't know what saying anymore but uhh - I hope that you guys get what I mean or am trying to say at one point or another. LOL.

Good night, earthlings;) Wish you all a life full of love and serenity:> HEHEHE. :)

Tagalog Soup For Breakfast ♥

A Good Morning Text for a Chinese Boy with Fat Thumbs But Has No Eyes

Magandang umaga, batang walang mata:)

Pagkabangon ay kumain ka sana:)

Hindi ko man alam ang handa sa inyong lamesa,

ang mahalaga ay kumain ka:)

Maging masaya sana ang araw mo:)

At wag kalimutang may taong tulad ko:)

Na minamahal ka ng buong atay, tiyan, bituka, at balunbalunan:)

Wag ka magalala, dahil syempre mahal din kita, ng buong puso at isipan:)

Medjo makeso man ang mensahe ko ngayong umaga,

sana'y lubos kang natuwa:)

Ano Babe, napa-smile ba kita?:)

Aba kung hindi, ngumiti ka now na, para di ako mapahiya:))

John Rae Mendoza Valiente, mahal na mahal kita:)

Pag-ibig ko para sayo'y:

Parang umaapaw na tubig sa timba,

Mas malaki pa sa aking mga hita,

Mas malinaw pa sa'king malalabong mata,

Tinatamad na ko magisip pero syempre, marami pang iba:)

Minsan lang ako managalog kaya't sinasagad ko na..

Babe, inuulit ko, MAHAL KITA:)

Kahapon, ngayon, at marami pang umaga:*

Sent:

07:44:15am

Today

(LOL)

♥

My Answered Prayer :)

This post goes to Tarts, Empi, B1 and other highschool loves:)

I already have a boyfriend. LOL.

(PLEASE DON'T TELL ANYONE ELSE COZ IF THIS REACHES MY PARENTS I'D BE SO DEAD. WELL, ANG ALAM NILA IS HE'S COURTING ME PA - BUT PLEASE, LET ME BE THE ONE TO TELL EM COZ I GOT PLANS ON WHEN AND HOW - SO SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE AND BE A GOOD FRIEND:* THANK YOU! LOL.)

His name is John Rae Valiente. I met him at my college friend's debut just this January. January 8 to be exact. That night, I swear I barely noticed him and some of you even know I got my dibs on his friend. I was even with him till I don't know what AM - but we barely talked and again, I barely noticed him.

How and when did it all start? Well, we started to sort of have this group called TAGS. We're 6 in the group. Jodie, Ingrid, Irvy, Jerome, John Rae and me - Sarah. LOL. January 29, 2011 - College Night sa AC. That day din, we had our Open House sa school. We attended the Open House - but ditched college night. We, TAGS - went to Tagaytay. This was the second time we'd ever meet. But before this day - we've been communicating thru fb - not just me and him - but all of us. Hanggang 12 ng gabi - I was with them. That time, I still dint find myself attracted to him. But I did know that I always - always found him funny.

Tas sa fb, yun nga. He's really funny. He's best friends with Irvy - Ingrid's current boyfriend. Things were pretty fast between em - but you wont doubt it if it's real - coz it totally seems like it is. Anyways, I'm really good friends with Ingrid - we're close. So when things between her and Irvy were turning up pretty good - napapadalas din yung usap namin ni John Rae. Still - walang kahit ano. Pero yun nga - tawang tawang tawa ako lagi sakanya. It's like after a really long day from school - sa gabi yun yung pinaka epic kong tawa - pag nakausap ko na siya.

We never became cheesy - there never was anything clear. We just got to talk to each other often - and yeah again, he never failed to make me laugh.

I found myself starting to like him when I knew I started to WANT to talk to him every night if possible. That when I thought about him during the day - I'd remember our conversation and I'd just find myself smiling. But that was plain simple attraction. Then one day, Ingrid told me that Irvy was gonna pick her up at school and was gonna bring a friend along. He mentioned someone else. Ingrid and I go home together as well. Tas when we got out of the school tas walking na ... chenen. Irvy was with John Rae. My tummy tumbled - it frikkin' hurt and I don't know if it were butterflies but I do know I got shocked and somewhat nataranta and shit. But of course, I had to stay calm and act normal. Well, before that day nga pala - I don't remember when - when Irvy dropped by just to see Ingrid for a while and brought her donuts ... while I was with him sa labas ng school ... I remember having to mention some other guy's name but his name slipped out of my stupid little mouth. Tas I couldn't hide my smile anymore - and Irvy just kept on teasing me and I felt like shitshitshit. Going back to the day they fetched Ingrid - I wanted to go home because I was nervous but wanted to stay because I wanted to be with him I think - LOLOLOL. Then then then, we ate at Mcdo. Irvy and Ingrid left the two of us - and he was quiet like shit - he barely even looked at me. But that's fine. Medj nairita pa ko after that day - I was thinking that if ever he knew that I liked him - ang feeler naman if he'd ignore me.

But things dint get awkward. We still talked often thru chat and stuff. Tas still - none. Time passed and mas napapatagal yung paguusap namin. Wala naman kaming pinaguusapan - pero tawang tawa parin ako.

Tas .. ayun. Fast forward to the time it was just the two of us. LOL. Well, it was Anna Llamas' birthday. And bago yun, nagaya na ko na magmovie kaming group. Since pwede ako lumabas that day. Well wait. Di pala. Day before that pala - kachat ko siya. Then nagaya siya ng movie - tas sabi ko kaming dalawa lang ba then he said ayain ko daw yung iba. HOHO~ but - to cut the pretty long story short - we ended up watching a movie - ng just the two of us. We watched Rango. And to those who know me pretty well - I've never ever gone to the movies with a guy ng kaming dalawa lang. Even I dint know what came over me that time for me to agree to watch a movie ng kami lang. Anyways, nothing happened naman sa movie house. But there was this part wherein I got his phone and dint want to give it back - I turned around and when he was trying to get the phone back - it was like he was hugging me or it was just my imagination. Shempre kilig na kilig ako that time and kung pwede lang di ko na ibalik - but I did. And just recently - he told me he was trying to hug me. HEE HEE:"> LOL. Goiiiing baaack - I still dint want to assume anything. But I do know I had such a huge smile on my face the entire time. He tagged along sa dinner pa nga e. After dinner - wala lang. Normal bye lang. He even stayed with my friends pa that night. Tas when he got home - nakatext ko pa siya till 2am I think? Ah basta. Wala parin.

Now, that was the first time na kaming dalawa lang. Nowwww fast forward to ..... when was the first time I sort of could assume stuff already - it was after they had dinner at home. After dinner, when they were about to leave already, Irvy hugged me goodbye. Tas he was about to hug me too tas turned around and said next time na daw and shit pag daw may muscles na siya. LOLOLOL. Basta. Medj ka-bv. Pero pero - he made bawi when he texted me that night when he said na he should've hugged me coz it'd take a long time pa before we'd meet again - I felt like Nam that night kilig na kilig na kilig sobra. HAHAHAHA~ ilang days nalang kasi we'd be leaving for Cebu na - so yeah - 9days in Cebu is a pretty long time.

In Cebu - we got to text each other everyday ... and practically the whole day even:) Tas .. there was this one night in Cebu na I got to talk to him sa phone .. we talked for more than an hour or so. Still, I had a smile on my face no shit could wipe off;) :"> :)

One day in Cebu - we got to talk about him coming over .. I can't remember how the conversation went .. basta - he said he'd go here sa bahay:) Chenen. A day after ako nakabalik from Cebu, which is the day bago ako umalis for Cagayan de Oro - he dropped by:) Shempre masaya:) Pero we still never talked about what it was going on between us .. we still weren't sweet or cheesy .. we were just .. us. How we were talaga with each other:) But that day, he promised me a hug e - so he hugged me. Alam niyo yung feeling na ... everything just feels so right. Parang .. this is one hug you'd want to last forever - yung ganun? Basta yun. :)) Pero still - we dint talk about stuff. It was just nung nakauwi na siya and magkausap kami sa fb na .. we finally talked about us. It was quite a shock coz hindi lang siya umamin na he liked me - but he also confessed that he loves me. That night - ako medj nagulat - de. Nagulat talaga:o:)))) Tas .. ayun. We talked till .... almost 5am. My flight the next day was at 2pm - and it was totally fine. Mga tipong ayoko na matulog. HAHAHAHA~ but we had to not talk anymore kasi umaga na and folks were already about to get up. PS, all I told him that night was that I knew I liked him a lot - pero love? Meh~ :))

Blablabla~ I got my phone back that day. Wala kasi akong phone for 2days. HEHEHEHE~ long story. Tas .. ayun. The whole stay in Mindanao was ... fun - of course. Pero what made every day  feel so much better to wake up to - was the thought that I could get to talk to him again - text or talk sa phone. So .. one week yun. Every night, magkausap kami. Tas till one night, we were talking about the moon .. tas kesyo may sinisigaw yung buwan. Tas he actually told me "I love you Sarah" daw yung sinisigaw nung buwan - pero that was thru text. Tas I still dint respond to it. Pero shempre - mamatay matay na ko sa tuwa. HAHAHAHA~ and then .. April 17 - kausap ko hanggang almost 6am sa phone - so April 18 na yun. Around 5am - nung maliwanag na .. he actually said I love you tas .. ayun - I was so damn weak - I responded. HOHO~ :))))))

So there. Sa text .. lagi ng may Love you:) Tas .. pero sa phone .. medj di pa masyado pero yeah - we ended up saying it often narin nung mga last days ko na dun;) :)) HEE HEE. Sa dp ko sa fb, siya kausap ko sa phone:"> Saya ko no?:"> HEE HEE HEE. Ayun:)

He was supposed to fetch me sa airport but parents said sa bahay nalang. Soooo~ he came by kahit super late na. We got here almost 9 na. Flight kasi namin medj nadelay. Tas ayun. Nakasama ko lang siya for 2hours. He left na ng 11 e. Makati pa uwi niya so - :') 

We became official just this Monday - April 25th. I had to meet up with sir Hans. That day din, we had lunch with my aunt and my cousin Karmina. Tas right after meeting up with sir Hans, we headed home narin;)

He .. makes me happy. He makes me feel secure. He .. inspires me. He's sweet. He's funny. He's determined? Not with me in particular - but how he wants his life to be like. He's got really good family ties and stuff. He's caring. He's patient with me. He's making extra effort (I think) to please me;) John Rae's my answered prayer, guys;) I seriously could not ask for more;)

He lives in Makati and he studies at PATTS - and he wants to be a pilot. As far as I know and from what he tells me - he's sure that this thing we've got is for real - as in ito na. As in talaga. from where I'm coming from - believing his promises would be hard and a bit impossible considering the fact na parang ang bilis ng lahat - pero I dunno. Somewhat naniniwala na ko sa love story ng iba na ... pag ito na - ito na. Gets? May mga bagay na kaya mo lang pinapatagal because you're still doubting it and you lack faith in what you feel that's why you still can't commit yourself to it - but when you know it - you just know it. ;) Parang .. love just suddenly defies the length of time, distance and a whole lot more. All I'm trying to say is ... though all that really matters is how strong our faith is in the two of us - it would help a lot if people important to us had as much faith in us too;) Do you guys get me?;) So ... here.

Walang pwedeng magsabi na I'm not sharing or why dint I tell you or whatever coz everything's here na. And it's pretty much obvious that you mean a lot to me as to why you're able to read this. I wanted you to know. ;)

If you got questions or insights or whatever - feel free to ask/tell me. LOLOLOL~ Thank you:):))

Yun lang:)

If people are interested, they'll ask. ;)

I was just thinking...it's funny how different things could always turn out to be. Everything sometimes ... seem so ironic.


I've got so much going on in my life right now. I mean - my life has damn been interesting. But I dunno. I just wonder - when is it gonna be interesting enough for people to care enough to ask?


I don't know why high school seems so far already. Bilang nalang sa kamay ko yung mga taong nakakausap ko from high school - and what's more surprising is that - hindi naman talaga sila yung super ka-close ko since before.


I mean - I've got groups pero - damn this is hard to explain. Well point is - it's true. That when people want to be in your life or be a part of your life - they'll make an effort to be in it.


That some things have just become labels. Kaya nga minsan mas maganda pa talaga yung wala nalang label. Is it my fault that I'm in Makati and they're in Taft? But that's not an excuse coz - I should really cut this shit already. It has totally become my unnecessary stress. It makes me sad and that's just it - it makes me sad. Plain sad. Parang - wala. Yung parang hopeless situation na siya? I mean - when I miss them, I let em know and shit pero daaaaamnfuck~ wala e? Ang cold ng dating? I doubt that this is because I've got a new set of friends. Actually, bago ko pa naman sila mameet I've been feeling this way na e. Na talagang kelangan magkita-kita kami para lang ma-feel mo na there's still something. I dunno. I never meant to compare stuff - but I'm just stating facts and really - ewan ko.


The other weird thing is that - mas updated pa yung best friend kong nasa ibang bansa bukod dun sa mga andito. I mean - we're all busy ...  but it's just sad when you've already run out of time for people who once meant so much to you. At least that's how I felt. I used to feel as though super importante ko. I know naman that I often made aya friends to hang out and shit - tas get no response. Who wouldn't get the fuck tired of doing that over and over. You start to give up - tas alam mo yun - for the love of friendship and pinagsamahan - you just end up being warm again and being sweet and approaching them - gets? It's .. ewan ko.


I ... should just go and watch a movie now.

Nah. Not yet? Or not ever? We'll see ; )

• You know you're in love when the happiness you feel can no longer be contained.
• You know you're in love when you stay the fuck up till morning just because you guys are still talking.
• You know you're in love when you just cannot stop smiling.
• You know you're in love when randomly smiling in public has become okay for you.
• You know you're in love when you think about a person the moment you wake up and just before you sleep and practically the whole day - that's when you've got it bad.
• You know you're in love when - you just know it yet can't explain why or how - you just are.

Apparently, I'm not in love. I just look like I am in love. I just seem like I'm in love. I somehow act like I'm in love. But in fact - I'm nowhere close to "in love". ;) Or am I? Nah. I don't think so. I aint even close to falling! But I am happy :) Very happy :)

Well - I've blogged about him already - previous post. And ... well, I don't know what else to say. Again, though it's a bit confusing coz he's so damn hard to read - I'd prefer not assuming anything at all than to get my hopes up on something that's nothing naman pala talaga. But you see ... he was different last night. <:D He was super cute and charming and I don't really know if he's already making his moves - but he was a bit weird so - hindi ko talaga alam. ;) :)))) Funny no? Pero grabe. Yung ngiti ko abot langit :> HAHAHAHAHA~

I .. I don't know. All I know is .. right now - sobrang saya ko that I just need to let it out. Kakagising ko palang ng umaga - super nakasmile na ko D: Ewan ko. But I admit that he's the reason why I'm super happy - but the weird thing talaga is - wala namang kahit ano pero stillllll~

HEHE. Grabe. I lack so much sleeeeeep~ summer na nga nagpupuyat parin ako D: :))))) Pero kseee~

Anyways. Imma watch a movie para antukin or something. DANG~ nasasanay na ko magtaglish sa blog :| D: :)))) SAHREE~

ANYWAYS. Bye for now :) Good morning, earthlings! <3

Rather a change of heart :)

Sometimes .. it doesn't matter if there's "something" or there isn't any at all. Because sometimes .. all that could ever matter is how happy you are. I mean .. right now .. I'm so happy. The type of happiness you feel wherein you'd want the whole world to know how happy you are? HEE HEE. Heck no, I'm not in love - no, not falling either. :)

I don't know what this is, even. It's so confusing that I no longer want to be confused by it and for once - after so long - I'm letting go. It's like ... hindi talaga mahalaga malaman kung ano ba yung meron - ang mahalaga lang talaga is - masaya ako. And another thing is, it's so simple. Super simple. And I'm not even doing anything wrong. I'm not able to hurt others naman - and I don't think this thing right now would upset anyone for that matter. Ang labo ko no? HEHE.

What I'm trying to say is - sobrang babaw nito kung tutuusin. Kase - wala naman talaga. I don't know if I like him in a different way - but I do like him in a way that - he makes me happy without him even knowing that he does. This time around - this guy is really funny. He cracks the shit out of me. Stress reliever - super. He's nakakatuwa and nakakatawa - but that's just it. Period. ; )

No signs of anything naman so - no reason to fall or whatsoever. And I doubt that I'd fall without anything clear or whatever.. but I'm really really really happy :)

I get to chat with him for hours - and in that 4 or 5 hours of talking to him - I cannot stop smiling. Seriously. Even now that I'm no longer talking to him - my smile's like - WHOA. Hahaha. I dunno. ;)

Maybe I'm also this happy because ... in my mind, I know that I'm not expecting for anything at all. It's like, everything's so casual. Isa pa, I'm in no rush to be with someone naman right now e.

For me, what I think and how I see it - he's not the type who'd court girls and stuff. Though I do think he's the type who'd be serious with relationships ... I just don't think that ... I dunno. Mahirap iexplain e. Isa pa - I don't need to analyze anything. Wala naman kelangan i-analyze e? Kse wala naman talaga. Pero yun nga.

Ang saya ko :) Sobra :)

Dati .. I could remember holding Justin's hand (ex) real tight ... close my eyes then pray aloud. I'd often tell God .. "Papa God ... please please please let him be THE ONE. If he's not the one ... PLEEEEASE :( Siya nalang. Please please please. Kasi I know na .. there is no one else I would ever want to spend the rest of my life with but him. I mean .. kung may ibang nakalaan para sakin .. PLEASE .. si Justin nalang :( Oo? Talaga? Thank you!"

And now .. I'm all like ... "Papa God .. sana siya :) Pag siya - THANK YOU! :* Pero .. pag hindi siya, edi hindi siya ;) Thank you padin ;)"

DIBA - ang laki ng pinagkaiba.

So yeaaah~ I'm happy. So happy. Super happy. Hope this doesn't fade or wear off though. ; )

GOODNIGHT, earthlings! :* Oh and .. wish us luck!:D My block and I anddddd - it's also his finals tomorrow:) Wish him luck too:D HEE HEE <3

:)

Kasi wala pang tatlong buwan :)

March has just begun, and looking back - I don't know how else I could let God know how grateful I am to have people like you :) A new year indeed ;)


January was awesome. So was my birthday :) I got to hang out with a new set of friends. Grabe. It's like Feb happened so fast.

 

Then we had a fieldtrip :) Went to the HABF in Clark, Pampanga :)

(Click the photo for a clearer view :) From left to right: Isah, Charmzz, jian, Pao, Sarah(AWESOME JUMP THERE), Stel, Ingrid, Arjoy, Alec, Sky, Yay, Meg, Anna L., Jodie, Aly, Luisa, Sassa, Ana Q., Monica (another really good jump :> HAHAHA. <3 u!), Ahndie, Maffi)

Monday the next week, we celebrated V-day :) Block date but not really coz we weren't that many. Sang shit out at Red Box. Then had dinner at Yellow Cab. It was fun ;)

Then, we had our shoots for our short film. We joined PAFF! Amazingly, we got into the finals and I swear that we no longer had to win. being a part of it was more than enough. And just the other day, we found out that we came in 5th :D We were the only second year students who joined. The rest were 3rd year students. We get the award for Best Actress though :) The feeling ... was so fulfilling! All the hard work was all soooooo well paid-off. The sleepless nights and stressful rendering and exporting - were all worth it. :) Will be uploading the video as soon as I figure out how to resize it tho.

(Isabel made this one :) HEE HEE, sweet <3)

Photographed By: Therese Ungson
Our movie poster :)

So .. that's just about it :) A whole lot more to come :> :-bd Hope I could blog more often though. Summer - I can't waiiiiiiit :D